Pray

Kat from over at Inspired to Action had this amazing post today.
It comes on the heels of a conversation I had with J & B yesterday.  God's timing is always so cool.

I was talking to them about how I pray for them... and that I had recently come to realize that if ... and it's a BIG IF... but IF I had to choose between them being happy, healthy & having all their dreams come true... OR them following Jesus, I would choose for them to follow Jesus.  That is not to say I want my children to be miserable... but I know that true joy comes from Christ - not from the things of this world and especially not the things the world will tell them will make them happy.
Of course I pray for them to be safe, for God to bless them and guard & protect them in all ways (physical, spiritual & emotional).  But my most fervent prayers for them are to follow Christ...sacrificially...completely... sold out to Jesus with every beat of their hearts.  The way that I want to live... the way I struggle to live.

We clicked through from Kat's blog and watched this video of this song... it took my breath away at times.  Watch it intentionally... THINK... FEEL the depths of the words ringing into your heart.  I so hope that someone prays this way for me.

And the beginning of Francis Chan's sermon after the song has me intrigued... I'm going to see if I can scout up a link to that as well to watch/listen.  If I can find it I will try to come back and add it here later.

UPDATE: Found it!  Go here and scroll to the sermon "Power" by Francis on 7/6/08.  We are listening to it while J does her Algebra test (at her request).




Blessings on the journey,

Standard of Grace

Today I stepped way, way out of my comfort zone. 
And shockingly... I didn't die.  I didn't even throw up.  
Yay me!
Actually... Yay God!  Because it was only by His grace that today happened and the really awful part didn't happen (that would be the throwing up part). :-) 
I found this graphic and thought it was perfectly marvelous and so timely for me today!
Today was good... and hard... and terrifying... but mostly good.  And the parts that I'm so certain weren't so good - in my head (at the moment- in my insecurities) - and that didn't go as I'd planned, etc.  Those are still okay... because no one else knows what was in my head or plans.  ;-)
It was my expectations of me... and those all sort of fell apart as I sat around the table this morning with this completely amazing group of women. 
Nine of them and I was so scared! 
But they were so gracious, so thoughtful, sometimes funny, and so genuine & real... their faces and hearts smiling.  Words came... ideas were shared... some scriptures were read - though not as many as I'd had written out on pages of notebook paper and bookmarked in my bible.  
God was there... I'm sure of it. 
He meets us where we are... in the messy, in the scary, in the hard... and walks alongside holding our hands or simply carrying us fully in His loving embrace. 

And I am so thankful.

Blessings on the journey,

Kisses From Katie

Oh my heart....
A dear friend sent me a link to this blog (Kisses from Katie)... J & I watched the video on the sidebar (Katie's story) and my heart ached to be like this amazing young woman!   It is the same ache I had last year when I read the book Radical by David Platt.  J was immediately fascinated with the story.

I have wish-listed Katie's book.  I'm sure my parents will not be happy when J reads it.... her heart is already soaring to other lands when she reads missionary biographies. God is going to send my girl someplace...I'm certain of it.  This is just the sort of story J loves... and I think... the story she dreams of living for Jesus.

Falling Down and Up

When was the last time you fell down?

I mean really fell down - as in skinned hands & knees, limping home with tears in the corners of your eyes.  Were you 6 or 7 and pushed your bike home sniffling and thinking angry thoughts at the two-wheeled death trap that had caused your pain...vowing to never-ever ride again? At least not until well after mom had tortured you with some soap & water and maybe antiseptic spray and a few bandages. Remember those times?

I fell down yesterday.... and at my age and current level of non-fitness, it was a spectacularly UN-graceful fall that resulted in not only the aforementioned skinned hands & knees but a lovely cut right across the bridge of my nose.  Yes - I managed a face-plant into the pavement!  Now that takes some talent when all you are doing is walking the dog. Seriously....who falls down and hurts themselves like that walking the dog on a nice, faux-spring day?
Answer:  Me.
Well... I'm sure that other people manage some pretty dandy injuries doing some other non-dramatic things as well, but I'm considering that I may have a unique talent in this area.  I don't hurt myself often, (and I don't consider myself klutzy at all), but when I do hurt myself... they tend to be pretty awful and painful injuries doing mundane and normal things.  At Christmas this year I threw my back out while tying the lace on my slipper.  Several years ago I sliced my finger open  - with my wedding ring - while I was simply closing a storm door.  Can't say that I don't have my talents.

As for the "up" part?  That was afterwards...
When I fell, I was out with Piper alone and we were about a half-mile or so from home.  So I dusted myself off best I could - not realizing that the bridge of my nose was bleeding (I just knew my face hurt & a nasty headache had begun) - and we headed back home...slowly... limping a little... and yes, there were a few tears in the corners of my eyes and I was almost tempted to think angry thoughts at the dog for tripping me.  But as we made our way along ... there was a warm breeze, the sun was glorious and the sky....oh the sky!  The most gorgeous blue!
All of a sudden I felt a smile... really... it was pretty funny.  I'm almost 42... I was walking the dog on a nice day.... and I face-plant on the side of the road?  Seriously?   You can laugh...  It is really pretty ridiculous!

Before I fell, I'd been thinking about a new book study I'm going to be starting in a week.  It's something that I've felt that God wants me to do for quite a while and when the opportunity was offered, I said yes.  Willingly, but with lots of insecurity. 
As I walked... I was thanking God for the gifts of the day and then I started thinking a bit about the study, then I started to worry about how I was not equipped to lead this particular group of women.  Really... I bet lots of these women have forgotten more about scripture than I will ever know.  They've served God for years (here and abroad), finished college, are smart, talented, gifted & accomplished and they have some style! What am I thinking that I'm going to offer them?
And then -  WHAM!  I fell.  Concentration shattered - focus shift onto my immediate pain & minor embarrassment (a total stranger saw me fall). 
But as I was going home....the sky and sunshine... gifts from the God who loves me so much.  I could be thankful to God for those gifts even with my skinned hands/knees and aching face.
Why?  Because they were there... and I chose to see them as gifts. 

And the study?  It isn't about me!  I don't HAVE to be equipped!  Okay... maybe that doesn't make sense. But this verse popped into my head while I was washing blood off my nose...
2 Corinthians 12:9   But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

People, you don't get much weaker feeling than lying on your face on the side of the road. 
This study group opportunity is one that God has given me... He has a reason and He knows all about me. He must have a plan.  And because I said 'yes' to doing this.... He will use me  - somehow... perhaps in spite of myself.  Only because the deepest desire of my heart is to be useful for His purposes and to bring Him glory.... and I said 'yes'.  Stepping really far outside my comfort zone to do something that makes my throat tight but my heart leap with anticipation of joy.  I am so excited to see what is going to happen in the coming weeks!  God is going to do .... stuff!  And He is letting me be part of it!
I am so thankful to see this gift... and am looking forward to counting all the ones to come.

Blessings on the journey~

(Walk carefully!)

Worth sharing

I read many blogs... too many blogs sometimes... it takes time and I'm trying to cut back.  I use an RSS feed to sort through and try to pick & choose things that seem to jump at me.
I'm really glad I read THIS today and would encourage you to do the same.  We need to remember that there are no guarantees in our job description as mom.

Blessings on the journey~

Saffron - Broken

Saffron is the little orange kitten we adopted at the beginning of December.  She is absolutely adorable and primarily she is J's baby.  She lives in J's room and J has the responsibility to feed her and clean the cage, etc.  She takes this responsibility fairly seriously and takes good care of her fur-baby.  They hang out together all the time.  Saffron is a big help with Algebra and provides a great deal of amusement all the time with her antics.

Last week Saffron took a nasty fall and managed to break one of her hind legs.  This was traumatic not only for the kitten but for all of us as we made a late night run to the emergency vet and then had to leave our fur-baby for the weekend with our local vet until she could have surgery on Monday morning.  Thankfully our vet (Dr. Kaas at Mercy Animal Hospital) is outstanding and his staff is the best!  We were able to visit Saffy on Saturday for a bit and then bring her home Monday evening after successful surgery to repair the leg.

She is home now and we will be playing kitty-hospital staff for the next few weeks.

She keeps trying to walk, wants to play and climb while her pain meds are in full force and has begun trying to chew her stitches (hence the kitty-version of a cone of shame).  I have a feeling the vet's instructions to confine her for a month are going to be very hard to follow.  She is not buying the idea of just laying around for a few weeks.  Prayerfully she will behave herself enough to let the leg heal before she tries to get too adventurous.

Change of Focus

What do you see in focus here?

How about here?

In January of 2011 I read Ann Voskamp's book One Thousand Gifts and it started something... something that my kids and I have continued through the year.
We began counting the gifts God gives - not every day, but taking the time purposefully to notice the things God gives us each day that we appreciate... or even the things that are HARD but help us to grow as people and to lean heavy on the One who holds us in His nail scarred hands.
As of yesterday we finished 2011 with 1111 gifts counted.  I hadn't really thought much about that number until early this morning when I wrote this on the top of a fresh page in our journal counting book:

Praying that we will continue to count the gifts that 

God allows in our lives each day.  

Welcoming 2012 with the full expectation 

that we can see God's fingerprints in our lives

each day when we remember to look for them.

Then I began the counting numbers on the page: 1112
That is the first number for our new year on the first day of 2012.  I smiled.

When I went outside with the dog this morning I saw the clothesline on the deck in the sunrise - laced with icy drops.  If I only look at the drops on the line - I can see in the background -hazy - the sunrise firing the dawn through the trees.  If I look past the drops glittering I can notice the leaves of orange still clinging to bare branches and the haze of moisture between the dark tree outlines.  Beautiful in either focus really.
Like my life.
Some days I focus on the drops, the daily routines & errands and 'to-do' lists.  And other days I have the glimpses of how God is using the drops to frame the beauty of His light shining in my bare spots to fire a new adventure.
New Years is a time of reflection and of looking forward.  I wait anxiously to see what new things God will show us this year.

See, I am doing a new thing!
   Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
   and streams in the wasteland. ~~Isaiah 43:19

Blessings on the journey~