Right now ... (a thankfulness post)

Right now I am thankful for the truth of scripture in our lives.  God's word doesn't change and His truth endures forever!

Hand-made sign that now hangs in our living room.
I bought this years ago in support of a mission trip - scripture supporting the spread of Jesus.

Right now I am thankful for the quiet sounds of chickens pecking around outside and 2/3 of our cats watching them from the window by my desk.

Saffron (Orange) and Gypsy (Black)

Right now I am thankful for Steve's job that provides for our family and allows him to work from home two days each week.  Also for the jobs the kids have that give them spending money, hard work that teaches them things and builds their muscles as well.

Right now I am thankful for ....

• my washer/dryer and the ability to do laundry daily if needed.
• clean, running water and electricity that are reliable
• air conditioning in summer and heat in winter
• my gardens and the ability to grow things - both to eat and just to be pretty
• my family and that we laugh together
• ice cream
• always having projects to work on and the ability to do so
• friends who share my life
• our Pastor and his family that are becoming dear friends
• our church that is growing us in many ways
• vehicles that work reliably and are safe
• grown children that come to visit fairly often
• teens that are respectful, responsible, smart, fun young adults
• pets that add love and fur to our lives
• every good gift that God bestows

Right now I am thankful that I know beyond all doubt that I serve a Savior who loves me and will never leave me.  That God is Sovereign King over all things and holds our future secure in spite of the changing winds of this life.  

Right now I am thankful... and that is a very good thing indeed!

Blessings on the journey~

Today's Reading

During my morning 'quiet time' I often read the day's portion from this book My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers.   This is often considered a classic for followers of Jesus as part of their devotional reading time.
Today is May 6th and the following is what I read this morning.

Liberty and the Standards of Jesus
"Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free.." ~Galatians 5:1
A Spiritually-minded person will never come to you with the demand - "Believe this and that"; a spiritually-minded person will demand that you align your life with the standards of Jesus. We are not asked to believe the Bible, but to believe the One whom the Bible reveals (see John 5:39-40). We are called to present liberty for the conscience of others, not to bring them liberty for their thoughts and opinions.  And if we ourselves are free with the liberty of Christ, others will be brought into that same liberty - the liberty that comes from realizing the absolute control and authority of Jesus Christ. 
Always measure your life solely by the standards of Jesus. Submit yourself to His yoke, and His alone; and always be careful never to place a yoke on others that is not of Jesus Christ.  It takes God a long time to get us to stop thinking that unless everyone sees things exactly as we do, they must be wrong. That is never God's view. There is only one true liberty - the liberty of Jesus at work in our conscience enabling us to do what is right.
Don't get impatient with others. Remember how God dealt with you - with patience and gentleness. But never water down the truth of God. Let it have its way and never apologize for it. Jesus said, "Go... and make disciples..." (Matthew 28:19), not, "Make converts to your own thoughts and opinions."


Blessings on the journey~

Another Chance to Change the World (or at least a small part of it)

A few years ago I stumbled across a blog with a cool name "The Gypsy Mama" (aka Lisa Jo)... how fun and interesting and real she was to read!  She has since stopped wandering as much to keep the moniker she had and even has become a US Citizen!
Today I still read her blog sometimes and follow her on Facebook to keep up - as I'm pretty well beyond the stage of littles that she is living and my focus is shifting as God leads my heart to different things.  But I'm still a mom obviously and my heart cares deeply about 'mom' things.
So today she posted this on Facebook and I clicked through to her blog to read... and immediately clicked further through to be part of something that God is building on the other side of the world.  Because the moms there matter... to God and so to me.  He is the one that provides opportunities for everyday, ordinary people like me (and you!) to be part of enormous Kingdom projects!  Even if only through our prayers.

Photo from Lisa Jo's site

Blessings on the journey~

Theme Reading

I'm reading several books at the moment...nothing new there.  But there is a theme in my reading right now... discipleship.  What does it mean to really be a follower of Jesus. 

Two of the books that I'm reading right now are proving tremendously helpful, instructive, convicting, insightful and comforting.  Sound conflicting & confusing?  You ought to live in my head! Kidding!  There are enough people in their right now to populate a small town - no more vacancies.

Anyway - I'm reading these:

Cost of Discipleship is a 'classic' among many in the Christian community.   I'd been listening to an audio version but really wanted to have the hard copy in my hands to absorb better.  I borrowed it through inter-library loan... hoping to keep in for a few weeks to really get a good grasp and not just a read-through.

This book was recommended by Shaun Groves a while ago... I got a copy and it sat on my shelf for a while.  I started it a few weeks ago and have been going through it slowly.  It's amazing.

Happy reading!

Blessings on the journey~

Snow and other weirdness

These are photos from my front yard this morning... crazy!  I was NOT looking for a snowstorm this week, in fact, I have a catalog for garden seeds on my nightstand right now and had begun entertaining thoughts of attempting to grow things again this summer. *sigh*  In time I suppose... all this white stuff has to melt soon.. right?
It has been sort of a weird week here in a few ways - not just because of the crazy snow.
Steve and I celebrated our 16th year of wedded wonderful-ness on the 29th of February.  We only have an actual day on the calendar once in 4 years, so this was big.  Normally I would be spoiled with some amazing present from this incredible man who loves me so much, this year we have had some other family financial obligations that trumped frivolous expressions of love (like kitten leg surgery and a new car engine).  I guess this is what happens to old married people. :-)   It is all good - our family come first always and I already have more than enough of everything... I am most blessed among women.
We spent the day together as a family - made it a school holiday for the kids and enjoyed a nice day.  We even had a lovely dinner out together while the kids were at youth group.  I don't remember the last time we sat in a mostly empty restaurant and just talked for an hour after dinner.  It was really great.  Of course the fact that it was a Wednesday off of normal life, and then we had the snowstorm come through and messed up our 'normal' again on Thursday sort of has me all off-kilter now.

Most of the weirdness has been internal for me - emotional & spiritual - as I'm struggling to find some answers and direction with some heavy things in my life. I long desperately to be useful for God... to have my heart broken for the things that break His heart... to serve & love the way Jesus does (and did during his ministry).  To not just have a vertical faith - but to live my faith horizontally.  I want to be a conduit for God's grace in this broken world.

I'm reading a few books at the moment and two of them are about trusting God.  One is for my regular ladies bible study group on Monday nights and the other is part of a daily devotional series I bought through Vision Forum.  Both are excellent.
Today in the devotional book, the author shared 3 scriptures that really struck me.

"Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.  He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD." ~Deuteronomy 8:2-3

I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted.  ~ Job 42:2

Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast. You have heard of the steadfastness of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful. ~James 5:11
 
And then during my regular prayer time and scripture reading I came across this one:
I know, O Lord, that the way of man is not in himself,
    that it is not in man who walks to direct his steps.
Correct me, O Lord, but in justice;
    not in your anger, lest you bring me to nothing. ~Jeremiah 10:23-24

I know God is trying to teach me some hard things... and I know that I am often slow to hear/learn.  I'm very grateful for His infinite mercy & amazing patience with me as I struggle to sort out lessons, truth and direction.  I pray from the depths of my heart for wisdom, discernment and clarity.  I trust Him and know that he has a Sovereign plan.  I long to be part of His Kingdom work in my everyday and anxiously await more and more of Him being poured into my heart/soul/mind so that I might be more like Jesus.


Blessings on the journey~

Pray

Kat from over at Inspired to Action had this amazing post today.
It comes on the heels of a conversation I had with J & B yesterday.  God's timing is always so cool.

I was talking to them about how I pray for them... and that I had recently come to realize that if ... and it's a BIG IF... but IF I had to choose between them being happy, healthy & having all their dreams come true... OR them following Jesus, I would choose for them to follow Jesus.  That is not to say I want my children to be miserable... but I know that true joy comes from Christ - not from the things of this world and especially not the things the world will tell them will make them happy.
Of course I pray for them to be safe, for God to bless them and guard & protect them in all ways (physical, spiritual & emotional).  But my most fervent prayers for them are to follow Christ...sacrificially...completely... sold out to Jesus with every beat of their hearts.  The way that I want to live... the way I struggle to live.

We clicked through from Kat's blog and watched this video of this song... it took my breath away at times.  Watch it intentionally... THINK... FEEL the depths of the words ringing into your heart.  I so hope that someone prays this way for me.

And the beginning of Francis Chan's sermon after the song has me intrigued... I'm going to see if I can scout up a link to that as well to watch/listen.  If I can find it I will try to come back and add it here later.

UPDATE: Found it!  Go here and scroll to the sermon "Power" by Francis on 7/6/08.  We are listening to it while J does her Algebra test (at her request).




Blessings on the journey,

Are you flour?

Are you flour?

I know... weird question huh?  I was refilling my smaller kitchen canister from my big flour bucket and suddenly thought about some scripture I had read during my morning bible study time.  It was Luke 13:20-21
          Again he asked, “What shall I compare the kingdom of God to? 
        It is like yeast that a woman took and mixed into about sixty pounds
        of flour until it worked all through the dough.”


This was Jesus speaking (that is why I put it in red), and he was trying to make a point (obviously!).  As I was filling my canister with flour I thought about it and had one of those 'ah-ha!' moments.  Jesus is the yeast to my flour.  He works in me to make me into something else...something bigger, better and more useful than I am by myself. 

By His work in my life I can do things I would NEVER be able to do on my own. Sometimes I work  in ways that are lopsided or even fail to rise to an opportunity He puts before me.  But He never gives up on me... He'll keep kneading me and reshaping me until I am what He has planned for me. 

60lbs of flour is a LOT of flour people. 
My big buckets hold about 25lbs each and it takes me quite a while to work through one bucket, even with all the baking I do here.  So if I'm 60lbs of flour... I have quite of bit of work to do for the kingdom.  And that makes me smile! 

What will you be?  Artisan braided bread?  Gooey sweet pastry? A fancy cake? The possibilities are limitless.... God is so imaginative and creative!  He has something special in mind for each of us and I pray that I will be all that He has designed me to become.  Useful for His purpose and to add something to the enjoyment of life for others as well.


Blessings on the journey~

Trying to walk

Photo credit Ann Voskamp

Sometimes trying to walk is hard...

As a follower of Christ I'm supposed to walk the walk... the one I talk about so easily.  The one espoused by countless books and blog posts.  The one that is ... hard.

We are called to live in community, to build relationships, to reach out and connect in real life.  And I sit alone in the kitchen, typing on the keyboard while words and pictures fill the screen.  How is that a connection?  How has all this technology made things better for the relationships?

I almost cried talking to Steve last night about how my heart aches for 'realness' in life.  How I feel so cut off - yet don't know how to connect.  Everyone is too busy.  Everything is digital and sound bites and 'tweets'.  I long to slow down, disconnect and really LIVE.  And yet I sit here, typing away.... 

A friend is hurting... and I went to her home and hugged her and spoke with her for a few minutes.  And it was REAL.  My heart beat faster as I could feel her heartache in her words and see the mama-pain in her eyes... and I could pray in earnest... lifting her before the throne of grace... bearing one another's burdens.

How do I live this?  How do I walk? 
Only by the grace of God and in His strength. 
        I can do everything through him who gives me strength. ~ Philippians 4:13
My feet would completely slip out from under me otherwise.

       Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. ~ Proverbs 4:26

Blessings on the journey~

Normal life challenges

Life is full of challenges, some large, some small.  Sometimes things are just annoying, other times they can be paralyzing and frustrating.  I think a great deal of how we face challenges comes from where we are in our faith walk.  If we can really and truly say "Nothing happens that hasn't been sifted through God's fingers and I trust Him.  It'll all work out somehow even if it is really hard."
Those are tough words to say and believe...deep down... believe and cling to... even in a dark shadow place of life.  I have seen and read about people clinging tight in the face of truly horrifying things.  I think God is having us practice with the baby steps of normal life challenges.  I'm thankful to practice so that in the event we have to face a really dark road, we can walk it confident of the goodness of the Shepherd who walks alongside us.

We've dealt with our first bout of illness here at GBA.  B was diagnosed yesterday with strep throat and has successfully completed his first day of antibiotics.  I can say honestly that I am most grateful that God allowed someone to discover amoxicillin.  B came downstairs this morning with a smile.  A first since Tuesday.  Now he will just finish the meds and should be back to normal quickly.
We've also been dealing with some car issues for A this week.  He had gone to get an inspection sticker last week and $700 later he was trying to leave the garage to go to class when his transmission went. *sigh*  I suppose it was all good that it happened where it did - he was safe - no accident occurred because of the problem, etc.  But we had to have it towed (thank goodness for AAA membership), and it's been up in Manchester for almost a week now.  If all goes well and the Lord blesses he'll have the car back tomorrow after a hefty price tag.  Thankfully, again, we are in a position to loan him the amount he needs to cover the repairs and he'll be repaying us over the next few months.
Early this week I had to face a series of uncomfortable medical appointments for some questionable issues.  I was fine and clinging tight... right up until the night before the appointments.  Then... I cried.  I was scared.  The 'what-ifs' invaded my mind in the darkness of the night.  But God is good.  Steve held me and comforted me and reminded me that my faith doesn't change when I am scared.  I had my appointments and so far, it all seems fine.  I won't have final answers for a few weeks, but am confident that God is absolutely in control and that it's all going to work out okay.

Practice is hard.
But I am thankful that He loves me enough to let me practice.
Learning to trust God in the realities of life instead of just the fluffy words of Sunday morning is essential.  Following Jesus isn't supposed to be all rainbows and butterflies.  In John 16:33, Jesus said,  "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
These words bring me great comfort.  I will have trouble, but the One I follow has already overcome it all.  That doesn't mean this life will be easy by any means, but it does mean that I don't walk alone.  I can have His peace.
And once again, I am thankful.

Blessings on the journey~

A prayer from Scripture

Psalm 119:65-72 (New Living Translation)

 ⁶⁵ You have done many good things for me, Lord,
      just as you promised.
 ⁶⁶ I believe in your commands;
      now teach me good judgment and knowledge.
 ⁶⁷ I used to wander off until you disciplined me;
      but now I closely follow your word.
 ⁶⁸ You are good and do only good;
      teach me your decrees.

Salt & Light

We sang this song as part of our worship time at church this morning.  I love it!

Life is hard for everyone

You know those days when you feel like you are dealing with some big, huge, awful thing?  And then you read something, or talk to someone, or see something on the news that makes you suddenly realize that what you are facing maybe ISN'T so big, huge, and awful?
I've had a lot of those days in the past year or so.  I mean... a lot.  God continually reminds me that even in the face of whatever it is I'm dealing with at the moment - He is with me, and someone else is dealing with something worse.
Now, all that being said... when you are facing something that for YOU is a big, huge and awful thing.  God cares.  It really is big - for you.  It is huge - for you.  It is awful - for you.  But really... in the scope of eternity, it isn't about you.  God will carry you through the darkness if you lean on Him. 
A friend of mine once wrote a devotional study on Psalm 23 - that famous one everyone (or almost everyone) knows by heart.  She wrote one line that stuck with me. "When you are walking through the valley of the shadow of death; keep walking and don't stop to pitch a tent."
We are not supposed to wallow in our big, awful and huge situations.  We are supposed to keep walking along the path that God has marked out for us, even when we only have the light for just the most immediate next step.  God sometimes lights the way with small lights instead of big floodlights.  Though I will admit, in my human frailties, I'm afraid of the dark and crave sunshine and bright lights.  I even have a nightlight in the bathroom at home. :-)  I'm learning to walk in His light, that is sufficient if not always comfortable for me.
Part of my point is that I've realized (albeit slowly), when I try to look outside of myself and my immediate circumstances or issues, things seem to be a bit better, a bit brighter, a bit lighter.  Maybe because I can leave whatever my load is at Jesus' feet and move on to attempt to lighten somebody else's load.
In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus says: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
And he says in John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
 In Psalm 71:19-20 David writes:
  Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God, you who have done great things.
       Who, O God, is like you?
  Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up.

Today I am dealing with some issues in my life.  But I know God is in control.  Nothing surprises Him and He has a plan for everything in my life - even when I can't possibly see how it will play out.  It is really hard, but I have to pray on it all and leave it with Him.  He will carry me through if I let Him.  I have to trust Him. 
And realistically, what choice do I have?  I can't change anything by worrying or fretting.  Jesus said in Luke 12: 25-26  "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?"  He is right, of course.

Lack of focus or just a busy life?

I have looked back at the variety of post topics and realize that I am lacking when I compare to other people who can blog about just one topic generally.  Like my darling husband who limits his focus generally to his running.  I know why he does it and it makes perfect sense, but I am more scattered.  Not in a bad way I think, I just have more random thoughts that are spilling out onto the internet.  *S*  At least I have set up another blog to limit myself in one area - my sewing.
My life is changing, God is growing me in a lot of ways and I find that so awesome.  I love to see how things are improving in our family by God's grace.
I am learning new things all the time.  The kids are growing and learning.  We have difficulties that God can use to refine us and stretch us.  We have mountain top moments that thrust us up close to the glory that we are to reflect back to our Heavenly Father.  I am so blessed.
This journey is so exciting!  I get to find new ways to do things, find moments to savor - like right now the laughter from the living room where my 2 kids are playing while the dog barks at them to be included.
I can find joy in each day... even in the 'work' of everyday life.  I love and am so loved.  It doesn't get any better this side of Heaven.

Many Reasons to Give Thanks

Psalm 69:30 I will praise God's name in song and glorify him with thanksgiving.

There are so many reasons for me to give thanks... when I attempt to count my blessings, I invariably lose myself in the warmth of God's great love for me and my family.
I have an amazing family.  Yes, I know I am a bit biased on the subject, and we are not perfect by any means, but I think they are all pretty terrific. 
My parents are supportive and loving.  Doting grandparents who would try to move the stars for the kids if there was a need.  They have given me a great example of a loving marriage and caring parenting to carry forward.
My husband... well... it's hard to know where to begin when talking about Steve.  He is one of the smartest men I know, he makes me laugh, is a great Dad and loving, caring husband.  He has been gifted by God with discernment that can be disconcerting at times, but is always direct and kind.  He is firm in his beliefs without reservation or apology.  He is a fantastic role model and teacher.  Strong athletically and intellectually.  He even likes my cat! :-)
My children... I have three at home now.  
A is our oldest boy, in his first year of college classes locally.  As many young men his age, he has his amazing heights of maturity and then those days where...well... we will just say "those days".  He is kind, helpful, strong and driven when his interest is piqued. I know that God has great plans for his life and we are all waiting on the Lord to reveal those plans.
J is our beautiful daughter on the brink of young-woman-hood.  She is smart, funny and loving.  She loves to read, loves animals and at the moment even loves math (crazy baby is enjoying learning Algebra!). God has also given her the gift of music through playing the piano.  J is very helpful and is learning where God has gifted her for service to others.  Her passions run deep, her heart is soft, her convictions very strong.  There is not a part of her that is swayed easily to change if she cannot be shown that the Lord requires such change.  Now she is embarking on the journey of becoming a godly young woman who seeks to please God and find His purpose for her life.
B is my baby... though he really doesn't like it when I call him that anymore.  He is a decade from baby-hood now and won't let Mom forget.  He is my warrior knight.  Willing to slay dragons and bad guys, as long as they don't masquerade as a spider in the bathroom.  He is working diligently to memorize scripture and hide God's word in his heart.  B has inherited his Daddy's logical mind and is often astonishing in his abilities in those areas that require that particular talent.  He also loves to read and his battlefield tactics in the computer animated world of historical warfare are stunning.  Athletic endevours are a growing interest and he has exhibited some natural talent there, though it is secondary to his God given musical gift with the piano. 

This has turned into a post of just my family - I love them all so dearly and could talk about them forever. They are the beginning of my song of Thanksgiving to the Lord as each is a gift and a blessing from above in my life.  My prayer is always that I remember to thank the Lord for every good thing in my life, and even for those things that are not so good at the moment, but that I know ultimately will be used for His glory.


Happy Thanksgiving!

Sunday Morning Musings

Sunday is sometimes my favorite day.
Today is not a normal Sunday though. Steve had a team race this morning, so I am having my coffee alone at my desk and listening to the kids playing downstairs. We will all begin getting ready for church pretty soon, but for now it's a quiet time to let my thoughts ramble.
I've read some of the news, but it is generally annoying so I didn't bother to read very much. No sense in starting the Lord's Day stressed out by the stupidity of the world in general and our government in particular.
Church is at 10:30 this morning. We are members of Riverside Christian Church (http://www.riversidechristian.com/) here in town, and are generally very happy with our church life/family. It is non-denominational which basically means it is not affiliated with any specific religious denomination, the idea being a Christian church is as it was in Acts chapter 2. I love the fact that it is a friendly, welcoming place without a lot of the judgmental glances you would normally find in a church in New England.
For whatever reason, it has been assessed (and probably rightly so) that NE is spiritually 'dead' compared to lots of other places in the country. It is a sad commentary for the place that once had faith as a cornerstone of daily life. But we muddle on, doing our best to live out our faith each day as God provides opportunity.
In the last 6 months or so, God has been working on me a LOT in the area of my responsibility as a parent to raise my children according to the biblical mandate from Ephesians 6 to "... bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."
The other passage that has been coming up repeatedly is Deuteronomy 6:4-9; Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. ^a]"> Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Given the culture around us, neither of these scriptures is an easy mandate to fulfill. We home school as part of what we feel God has laid on us as our responsibility. We try to live consistent lives in accordance to what we believe.
Christians are NOT perfect, but we are thankful for the grace and mercy of God that allows us to be certain of forgiveness. Living in New England, it isn't easy to be conservative and Christian. We are surrounded by liberal mindset and action - even our once conservative NH has fallen to social and fiscal liberalism. It is sad and could be depressing if we didn't have our faith. Knowing that nothing in life happens that has not been sifted through the fingers of God and will ultimately bring glory to Him in the end, gives us hope.